Wednesday, August 21, 2013


Dear Readers,
 Tomorrow my husband and I and our son, Holden go to court to finalize the adoption we began nearly three years ago. Tomorrow our son becomes a US citizen.
 It is a day we have been waiting on for a very long time.
 I hope you enjoy this post. It is filled with giddy, raw, full love.

I'm not sure where I was or what I was doing nearly three years ago tonight.
But, I am sure I was daydreaming about my future baby.
I am sure I was longing for he or she to be in my arms. Picturing myself with a child pressed against my chest, as I caressed wispy locks of hair out of sleepy little eyes.

Fast forward.

This dream came true.

Just tonight, I held a baby in my arms. I rocked him, and brushed the hair out of his eyes just before bed.
I pressed him against my chest, and breathed in his sweet little boy smell. I watched his eyes open and close, open and close. I just wondered what his little busy mind must be thinking.

And since I couldn't be sure, I told him what was on mine.

I told him tomorrow is the day. A day for big and grand things to happen.
I told him tomorrow, it all comes together. Three years in the making.
I told him that tomorrow is HIS day. He adoption becomes FINAL.
And, I kissed his plump, juicy lips. Over and over and over again.
And, like I always do, I told him I loved him. But, this time I added:

"I love Holden. Forever and ever and ever."

He giggled and giggled. I repeated the phrase a few more times.

I told him good night and started to walk out the door.

Just as I stepped out of the doorway he said...

", Appa, ever, forever ever. Goodnight, Omma."

And, that folks, says it all.

1 comment:

  1. So precious!!! I remember the longing in your eyes three years ago as we stood in the halls of CCDC discussing your future child. This is it... the day is here. Your forever and ever with your precious little man!! I would be kissing those little lips again and again and again too... they are luscious!!

    Congratulations!!! And, I love hearing you talk about your dreams coming true with your "baby"!! I am so happy you are able to experience so many firsts with him!!!