Friday, September 26, 2014

Maybe it's the changing season...

Maybe it's the chill in the morning air.
Maybe it's the feel of a hoodie around my neck.
Maybe it's the sense that everything in nature is about to shift.

But, I have that excitement building in my heart again.
I've had it for the past 30 some years now as Fall slowly approaches, and summer fades.
My favorite season is upon us.

But, leaves and fires and sweaters aren't what makes Fall my heartsong anymore. It's much more than that.

On Nov. 19, Holden has been home for two years. TWO YEARS.

This time two years ago seems like two minutes ago in my mind. Two seconds ago in my heart.

The utter waiting and longing for our adoption agency to give us the green light was excruciating. And, that pain will never be erased. I remember checking my email no less than 10 times a day from Sept through Nov. 3. Waiting. Waiting. Screaming. Crying. Waiting. Simply going crazy.

I remember my friends listening to the same old story.
I remember our parents just loving us.
I remember my boss letting me use her office one too many times. To make phone calls. To cry. To vent.
I remember feeling Grade A crazy. And, then having my adoptive Mom friends remind me that they too were crazy one time. And, it's OK to be when YOUR CHILD is half way across the world.

I remember it all.

And, all we ever wanted was to get on a plane, and pick Holden up, and love him forever.

Eventually, the call came.

I was sick with bronchitis, and Travis was stressed out with everything. But, when our agency said, 'he's ready!'-- every part of me lit up. I was on fire and in love with my baby!

I seriously don't remember finishing our packing or leaving our house. But I remember boarding the first plane. And, I remember how scared I was of flying. And like fog lifts off a sunny horizon, my fear nearly vanished. I didn't need the 10 anti-anxiety pills my doc gave me cause baby, I was high on love. Pure and raw and real. There's nothing like love.

November is just around the corner. And, a two year celebration is near.

Join with us in celebrating love, time, commitment and the ties that bind a family.

Happy Fall too :)

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